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Lost -- Episodes 13 & 14: Human Disqualification

Lost makes me feel like I find myself a little at a time with each episode. I'm not sure if that was the intention with the storytelling. Whether it was or not, that's what it does to me. As excited as I was for this episode, as overwhelmed with emotions, I would almost describe as regret for the wasted life each of our characters lived, the wasted opportunities to be happy, and I credit the storyteller for one, but more the director and actors for making me feel like I've lived every moment, not only those of Boo Jung and Kang Jae, but also her husband and his ex-girlfriend, the actress, Min Jung and Tak-yi -- everyone right along with them.

Life can be so cruel at times... if anyone deserves their happiness, it's Boo Jung and Kang Jae, but also the husband. I, on the other hand, anticipate the husband will also take it hard. He too will feel the guilt -- I hope it's not serious with the dad, which isn't saying much -- I just want the hurting to stop -- no more running away because that's all they have been doing. I hope the moments of happiness and coming alive they've each experienced give them the strength to face the issues head on and not retreat in wards.

Try as hard as I tried to understand why Boo Jung's husband couldn't be as free going with her as he is with his ex-girlfriend. I realized it's not that he doesn't want to, it's because he doesn't know how to be that with her. He probably never appreciated Boo Jung in the way he sees his ex-girlfriend. And probably because he finds in his ex-girlfriend what he's missing in his marriage, but I think it's more than her just making him feel needed or wanted. He has feelings for her and would've married her if it weren't for her mother. I don't think he would've let himself go as he has if it weren't her specifically. In the same sense that Boo Jung let herself go with Kang Jae. It's not only about feelings and emotions, but also about being accepted despite all the flaws that even they can't accept in themselves. I desperately want the two of them to have a prolonged overdo talk. They owe it to each other and the people around who care about them and them.

Boo Jung and Kang Jae's intimate moment was everything I hoped for, beautiful and tender, even the build up to it was breath-catching. The way Kang Jae runs out of Tak-yi's house, no words to describe it, it has to be experienced. But then all the moments in this episode and the series are not merely touching, but powering in many ways. It's the first time I felt like I couldn't, nor did I want to judge any of them for their choices. I simply want them to leave the sadness behind and go for their happiness. Because as they say, life is about finding the ones that make you happy, and freeing yourself from those who don't. Always easier said than done though, because as life gives, it also takes -- I hope it gives a lot more than it takes this time around. Watch episodes 13 & 14 here.



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